How do we keep moving forward when people keep pulling us down?

My skin is my own that I am living in. I am proud, but not blinded by pride. Proud of my identity, proud of my skills, proud of my heart. I will not settle for mediocrity.

Average at best, when you overhear mention of your name. Words not meant for you to hear, nor meant to hurt (too late). “Her? She’s nothing special.” “No, not her, I don’t care about her. This other girl I met.” You only wish you hadn’t overheard it, and all would be well. But the cracks in the ceiling spread.

Self-confidence is a fragile thing that is easily cracked by words and broken by actions. Actions speak so much louder than words. So we rely on those to tell us the story.

Don’t get me wrong. I don’t have time for those who hate. I don’t have time for those whose eyes mistake fake bake make up for beauty. I don’t have time for those who refuse to see beyond tired worn out eyes. I don’t have time. I don’t have….

But alone. In the end we find ourselves alone. Sometimes lost in the woods because we’ve strayed too far from the blue painted trees. Sometimes running toward the new leaves of change of the brightest hues of golden sun, burnt orange, cherry red, and espresso brown. The end, is less glorified than we’d like to believe. What happens after the end we may never know. But alone, we face the end alone.

I know I am not alone now. We are not alone now. You are not alone now. I give everything, without expecting a return. But hoping. Hoping I give to share and receive. Because if that is not it then what symbiosis are we living in. Maybe it’s just parasitic, but who’s the parasite? With every action there is a reaction. So be kind because humans are fragile. Be honest because humans need to learn strength. Be welcoming because no one wants to be alone and we’ve all been alone. And you remember, what it’s like to be alone. You remember how it feels to be left behind or left out or picked last for the team.

And be grateful for each moment. Tomorrow everything will be different, and tomorrow will be a new day. So bring everyone in your life all the love you can muster. All the random acts of kindness. And know that the favors will be returned some day, because love is too great a thing to be hoarded. It is too great to be locked and caged. It must be let free to spread out over the lost and lonely souls and bodies. The reward will be so much better if you let all the love out, than the feeling of fear that keeps it all inside.

I found strength through you. Through your warm and strong embrace that held all my pieces together when I felt like they would shatter. Your strength became mine, long after you were gone.  And I crave to feel the weight around me so I don’t float away into space. And I tuck myself in so tight at night to insure I don’t take off in flight.  And some days, and some nights, I still miss you.

Know that life is not forever. Don’t take any moment for granted. Don’t take anyone for granted. Live openly and honestly. Tomorrow is not always guaranteed. Accidents happen. Natural disasters destroy lives. Cancer spreads. And shit gets heavy. Let’s all be a little stronger for each other. A little kinder for each other. A little more loving, for each other.


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